[This is a post by a "guest Constance": someone who doesn't want her own pink apartment but just wants to do a one-time post. If you'd like to do a guest-Constance post, email it to me: constancethefirst at gmail dot com.]
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I am fucking sick and tired of people telling me they wish I was “happy.” I AM fucking happy. Just because I don’t have a man and YOU have a man or you WANT a man and don’t feel you can be happy without one does not mean I feel the same. In fact, I feel VERY differently. I am single and I am happy. I am a single mother of a five year old and I try to make the most out of my time with her and on the weekends when she goes to her father’s, I hang out with friends and feel I have a very active social life.
Oh, you want me to be able to fall in love. Because if I fall in love I won’t be so concerned with what my ex-husband and the woman he left me for are up to. Maybe. Oh, you wish I wasn’t so worried about the fact that they got married yesterday. You wish it wouldn’t BOTHER me so much. Well let me tell YOU something. I know girls who are happily married and FLIP THE FUCK OUT when their ex BOYFRIENDS get engaged to someone else so I think you’d be hard pressed to find any woman who has WALKED A MILE IN MY SHOES and LIVED THROUGH WHAT I’VE LIVED THROUGH NOT be upset when her ex husband marries a whore who becomes our daughter’s step mom.
(Sorry for shouting. I get real emotional about this. I’m not really shouting at YOU, dear reader.)
I have been married and it sucked. Probably because I was married to the wrong person, yes. But please note that I LOVE living alone. I LOVE having my own space. I AM FIERCELY independent. Sometimes I think it would be nice to have someone at my home who could help out but guess what? I talk to you people about your husbands and you bitch about them being men and they don’t get it and they have to be told to do everything; and this is your second marriage and if this doesn’t work out, forget it, you’re going to play for the other team; and he’s cheating on me but you’re cheating on him…it’s a FUCKING MESS.
Maybe you are jealous. Maybe you realize that being a single parent is hard but that also I get the best of both worlds: I get time with my child, I can have the house any way I want without anyone telling me what to do or that I’m not doing it right or fast enough, AND I still get to have a social life. I get to go to happy hour and be with friends and stay out until 2am on a Saturday (every other) and sleep all day Sunday if I feel like it and you’re pissed because you can’t because you’re stuck at home with your husband man-child and your kid.
Either way, whatever the deal is, I really wish you would just GET OFF MY FUCKING BACK.
