I am a little drinky tonight, and there is on one hand NO NEED because mother-in-law is GONE GONE GONE, but on the other hand MIL Gone meant husband-in-law was looking for a little something, and okay it was kind of my idea too, but anyway vodka was involved, and I swear, vodka is the best thing to happen for sex since TEENAGERS.
Also, here is what I would like to know: why have I never had a hangover? It seems like if I drink enough to be all WOOOOOOOOOOO and tippy, I should pay the price in the morning. How much do you have to drink to get a hangover? Not that I want one. I'm just curious.
My dear not everyone gets hungover...I don't. Consider it a blessing. And yes, vodka rocks. ;)
ReplyDeleteA few tips to avoid hangover. Stick with one liquor. Drink a lot of water before bed and take some headache medicine before bed.
ReplyDeleteFor me, I have to drink a ton to have a hangover. Hydration is also a big factor.
ReplyDeleteAs long as I'm relatively sober by bedtime, I'm fine. It's when the room is still spinning and I close my eyes and wake up 8 hours later that I'm hungover. And, frankly, I'm too old for that anymore, so I always sober up and drink a big glass of water before bed.
ReplyDeleteNEVER had a hangover?! That's awesome.
ReplyDeleteYou have to drink enough to regret drinking that much before you've even sobered up.
Ugh.
Just thinking about it makes me NOT MISS ALCOHOL during this pregnancy, if only for a little while.
Oh, sweet, sweet Constance/Rhymes with “Whistle”. I love you. I wish we could hang out together and buy stuff on sale and bitch about our significant others. Seriously. I was at the dollar store the other day and I saw a little bird picture that I thought you would like and I almost bought it for you even though I don’t actually have any means by which to give it to you. I know: a) creepy, and b) sad.
ReplyDeleteI would hypothesize that you’ve never had a hangover because of one of the following: A) You are one of those mythical unicorns of drinkers who are immune to hangovers. Having hung out with a nearly endless number of wretched drunks – none of whom seem to be able to avoid the hangover – I’d say this is unlikely. B) You are a tremendously savvy drinker who knows precisely what to do to avoid being hungover. Or maybe you’re just hyper-hydrated. Are you made of water? C) It takes so little to get you to WOOOOOOHOOOOOO that you never actually consume enough alcohol to get the hangoveries underway. I’d put my money on this one. My *vodka* money.
Test theory (C). The next time that passive-aggressive bag G-Ma K-Fed is in town, you and Mike tell her how hard it is to find someone who has the experience and expertise to deal with f!ve little ones, and then leave that miserable twat with your brood overnight while you and Mike go out to dinner and stay in a hotel. That will a) shut her fucking mouth, and b) give you the opportunity to kill a flock of birds (including the ones flapping out of her giant, wind-ravaged pie hole) with one mighty stone. First, choose your poison. Wine might be a good option. Drink enough to loosen up and have some sex that you and Mike *both* enjoy. Then drink some more. Drink to the point that you’re not only feeling loosened up enough to relax and let go of the whole birdy-pull grudge thing, but you’re also loosened up enough to tell Mike about how badly you want him to tie you up/watch you bang a hot brunette/whatever floats your naughty little boat. At this point, try not to drink so much that you pass out. Then shag some more. And maybe some more. And maybe go down on him. And, you know, whatever. Did you know that it’s possible to hit it so much that your sweetie will be out of commission for many days? And limping? With a head full of material to lovingly reminisce on when he finally recovers from your righteous loving? Then? The next day? When Mike is cradling his savaged winky? Let us know if you’re hungover! And if you are (and even if you’re not) take the wee-uns to Chuck E. Cheese to make up for their evening with Grammy Bargain-Mocking-Jazz-Hands. Good for them, and the pizza will be good for your (potential) hangover.
Hugs to you. Glad you made it through your own personal hell :-)
That's funny, 'cause Vodka is the reason I HAVE teenagers in the first place!
ReplyDeleteI think before you said you've never been drunk? So, you won't get a hangover just being tipsy. If you REALLY want one, try Tequila. Works every time:)
ReplyDeleteMixing different types of alcohol usually provides a hangover, as does cheap beer from keg circa college years. But the amount really depends on a person's tolerance.
I have had hangovers where I sincerely wished someone would kill me to put me out of my misery. Not that I'm proud of that or anything. I have had hangovers where I can barely form a sentence and want to remain in darkness until it wears off. Again, not proud, just the facts.
Qwanty, Love it!
ReplyDeleteC99
If the room is spinning at any point when you're laying down to go to bed, you will probably have a hangover! And, IT SUCKS! I HATE that feeling. Just remembering it is making me feel nauseated. It sort of feels like your worse pregnancy morning sickness but with a giant headache on top of it. And lots of regret.
ReplyDeleteI think you have to be a teenager or college student to get a hangover. Once real adulthood hits there are things so much more interesting to do than drink so much as to waste an entire weekend day recovering from the night before.
ReplyDeleteWeirdly, I don't get them anymore either. Granted, I rarely drink ever anymore, but man, on my birthday this past year, I got shitfaced. Beer (American and German), mixed drinks with different alcohols, shots - you name it. Not only did I not have a hangover, everyone told me the next day I didn't even ACT drunk! I don't get it. But thanks - I just added Vodka to this week's grocery list.
ReplyDeleteAlmost anything I drink gives me what feels like a hangover - I'm prone to migraines and all I know is alcohol gives me a migraine to end all migraines (tequila and red wine the worst). I used to drink rum drinks anyway, but I've stopped. Miss the tipsy, not the headaches. I wish I was as lucky as you Constance, but I'd likely be an alcoholic if nothing gave me a hangover...
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